If you haven’t been to a Bar Mitzvah in a while, you’ll notice that a new tradition has taken root – throwing candy at the Bar Mitzvah boy at the end of the ceremony. Not gentle throwing, but zinging candy from across the room so hard that it will leave a mark. And before you start thinking that girls are any gentler at a Bat Mitzvah, guess again.
The origins of pelting children with hard sweets are a bit murky. Some say that it is rooted in an old Sephardic tradition of throwing fruits and nuts toward newly married couples to wish them a sweet life, but no one really knows for certain. These days, throwing candy at a Bar Mitzvah boy or Bat Mitzvah girl is a popular practice no matter if you attend a Reform, Conservative, or Orthodox synagogue.
Although throwing candy at a Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah can be a lot of fun, be aware that not all synagogues permit it. Most rabbis are fine with throwing candy (nobody wants to be a party pooper), but some simply do not allow it. You should always check with your rabbi before making any candy plans.
Things You Should Know About the Candy Throwing Tradition
When preparing for the big day, it is very common to put a few pieces of candy in a small organza bag or jewelry pouch. They are a great way to control the amount of candy thrown and help avoid creating a mess in the sanctuary.
The bags are generally passed out by the friends of the Bar Mitzvah boy or Bat Mitzvah girl toward the end of the service. Some people include a small card that explains why the candy is being handed out. This avoids the embarrassing situation of someone unknowingly eating the candy during the service.
At most synagogues, the candy is thrown upon the completion of the Haftarah while the newly declared Jewish adult is still on the bimah. Some synagogues, however, ask the Bar/Bat Mitzvah to step down from the bimah first. This protects the rabbi and prevents candy from ricocheting off the Torah ark, which some people consider highly disrespectful.
Adults tend to shower the Bar Mitzvah boy or Bat Mitzvah girl with sweets by gently tossing the bagged candy. Their friends, however, usually sling the candy as hard as they can. Although extremely rare, bizarre injuries sometimes occur. Don’t fret about it though, it’s all in good fun.
Once the throwing is done, all of the little (and sometimes not so little) kids rush to the bimah collecting all the candy as fast as they can.
Bar Mitzvah / Bat Mitzvah Candy Ideas
Sunkist Fruit Gems are the most popular Bar/Bat Mitzvah candy. They are soft and kosher, which is why they are the candy of choice. Some parents, however, are seeking other candy options.
If you are looking for a soft candy to throw, gummy bears are always popular – but not always kosher. If a kosher gummy is important to you, check out Haribo Gold Bears. The ones in the supermarket are not kosher, but you can order kosher ones through their partner Paskesz. Other soft options include fruit roll-ups and Twizzlers.
If you are up for a little adventure and are fine with your child coming home with small welts, here are some other popular options:
- Individual packets of M&Ms
- Hershey’s Miniatures
- Bags of chocolate gelt
- Packaged Skittles
- Reese’s Miniatures
If you buy bulk mixed candy, remove the lolipops, please! As the old adage goes, “It’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye.”
If you are looking for a soft candy to throw, gummy bears are always popular – but not always kosher. If a kosher gummy is important to you, check out Haribo Gold Bears. The ones in the supermarket are not kosher, but you can order kosher ones through their partner Paskesz. Other soft options include fruit roll-ups and Twizzlers.
If you are up for a little adventure and are fine with your child coming home with small welts, here are some other popular options:
- Individual packets of M&Ms
- Hershey’s Miniatures
- Bags of chocolate gelt
- Packaged Skittles
- Reese’s Miniatures
If you buy bulk mixed candy, remove the lolipops, please! As the old adage goes, “It’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye.”
